My Awefull Life » A Pilgrimage of Wonder

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Solitude, Silence, Submission

Hi – It’s been quiet around these pages for a few days, and I haven’t meant to keep you hanging or wondering after news so I apologize. News has either been non-existent or discouraging. Every time I thought about posting an update I immediately heard things in my head like, “if you don’t have anything nice to say…” or Jesus’ directive from the gospels to, “submit to governing authorities,” or my personal favorite from Forrest Gump, “that’s all I have to say about that.” You know really, light-hearted, humbling pieces of advice to keep my mouth shut and never stop praying. So that is where I have been – attempting to still the noise and even more so trying really hard not to create noise just for the sake of noise-making, venting, justice seeking. I was starting to feel bad for how bad I was feeling – that nagging cliche of Christian culture implying that on the heels of every ‘this hurts!’ must come a ‘but God is good-ism.’ God is good. But this hurts. And saying so, and feeling so heavy the very prayers I utter feel as bricks thrown, heaved from my gut, does not mean my faith is lost. It quite simply means, this hurts.

In my impending guilt over the ache and weight of my soul, I turned to the prophet Jeremiah seeking some reference point for these emotions. For whatever reason, around me, when in doubt let’s check Jeremiah. I get him, and his words never fail to get me. Let’s be honest, who better to lament with than the author of Lamentations? And there it was:

Lamentations 3

7 My soul has been rejected from peace;
I have forgotten happiness.
18 So I say, “My strength has perished,
And so has my hope from the LORD.”


25 The LORD is good to those who wait for Him,
To the person who seeks Him.
26 It is good that he waits silently
For the salvation of the LORD.
27 It is good for a man that he should bear
The yoke in his youth.
28 Let him sit alone and be silent
Since He has laid it on him.
29 Let him put his mouth in the dust,
Perhaps there is hope.
30 Let him give his cheek to the smiter,
Let him be filled with reproach.
31 For the Lord will not reject forever,
32 For if He causes grief,
Then He will have compassion
According to His abundant lovingkindness.
33 For He does not afflict willingly
Or grieve the sons of men.
34 To crush under His feet
All the prisoners of the land,
35 To deprive a man of justice
In the presence of the Most High

Thank you great prophet, for words when I have none. And believe me or not, even in their anguish reading those words brought me peace and I slept better last night than any night in weeks. So well in fact when I did wake around 5:30 I thought I may have slept through any alarm going off in the mid of night alerting us to an email from the USE. Turns out I hadn’t slept through it, but an email did arrive about an hour later. Prayers have been answered and the Embassy has been able to make contact via phone with the officer they requested to interview, and they are now working in tandem to gather any last pieces of information required for our case to be cleared. The USE says they will let us know when they have all they need. We again are filled with hope and cautious anticipation – could it be tonight? Please God, let it be tonight! We have asked so long and so much of you I don’t even feel I can ask you to pray, but alas…please pray.

All love,


  • emily - My heart resonates with yours…continuing to pray with great hope and expectation of the things to come. I hope tonight brings restful slumber and news worthy of a great celebration….ReplyCancel

  • Jen Creed - I missed a few posts, but just caught up and wanted to let you know that we are still praying for you all! The post that mentioned Emma asking to see the video of her baby sister literally brought me to tears, and I am SO excited for the day that you are all together, just as God meant you to be. Holy cow, it will be so amazing. Love you all!!ReplyCancel

  • Crystal - Always ask us to pray – and I will always join you in praying. Lifting you all up sweet sister – looking forward to what lies ahead!ReplyCancel

  • Kristen Steele - Praying for you as I go to sleep tonight… May God grant you peace as you sleep and much joy when you awake!!ReplyCancel

  • Richard - I’m forwarding this news on to our KI group. You should lead our study of Lamentations 🙂 We will continue to remember you and your family in prayer. In v32 above (“For if He causes grief”), I was reminded of that Galilee storm that Jesus took them through… to stretch them and show them something new about Himself. “Keep your eyes on the prize, hold on.”ReplyCancel

  • Claudia - Lovely Sarah, When the Lord brings us to that place of utter dependence on him, Trust, Believe, Have Faith…BIG…Praying by the power of the Holy Spirit in Jesus Name. Isaiah 40:31 “Those who wait in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eages; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”ReplyCancel

  • Whitney Carlson - Sarah, you truly are a wise and faithful woman of God. Thank you so much for sharing your heart on here. I am praying for you guys and am so excited for the day when your family is all together!ReplyCancel

  • Failure to Thrive » The Richmond Family Adoption - […] I know will surface if I stay open to hear the words. It is the same Truth I clung to here and here, only now I have to find a way to make it real to me […]ReplyCancel

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